Kill Me Now!

About the book

The author spends his time trying to find the ONE, his soulmate, that special someone that he will spend the rest of his life with. Where is she hiding? Have they crossed paths before? Is she out there? While searching for Ms. Right, the author goes looking for love and gets into the strangest...

Kill Me Now!

Tag Archives: kill me now

My Next Life” by George Carlin

george_carlin_0203

MY NEXT LIFE by George Carlin I want to live my next life backwards: You start out dead and get that out of the way. Then you wake up in a nursing home feeling better every day. Then you get kicked out for being too healthy. Enjoy your retirement and collect your pension. Then when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day. You work 40 years until you’re too young to work. You get ready for High School: …

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Meeting on the golf course, a joke

Golf course

My good friend Ed, from my award winning book, sent me this joke by email and I felt I had to share it. It is about a meeting on the golf course.  It may be a bit rude for some of you. A guy was playing golf one day and he got lost. He saw a lady up ahead of him on the golf course and went to her  and said “Can you please help me, I don’t know what hole I’m …

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Matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match. The art of matchmaking.

Image courtesy of jesadaphorn FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Matchmaking has been around for a long time. Arranged marriages, considered a type of matchmaking, is in-bred in many cultures. Two sets of parents get together and decide that their children will marry one another when they are old enough. This can be for economic, political, cultural or religious reasons and it is irrelevant what the children themselves may want. In the Eddie Murphy movie, “Coming to America“, Murphy who portrays the crown prince to the throne of a fictitious …

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5 Love Songs They Should Write

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Sappy Love Songs We all know about those sappy love songs that tell us to fall in love and how wonderful forever will be. Those same love songs even may get us to the “Forever” part, but very few give us any practical advice on what long term relationships will be like. What we don’t hear is the less flowery more gritty everyday songs about love. Here are five love songs that somebody should write, that might actually be useful: …

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Who wears the pants around here?

who wears the pants

Who wears the pants in a relationship? Here is a joke that I was told before I got married: On Fred’s wedding he took off his pants and handed them to his bride, Wilma and said, “Here, try these on.” So, she did and said: “These are too big, I can’t wear them.’” So Fred said: “Exactly. I wear the pants in this family and I always will, and I don’t want you to ever forget that.” Then Wilma removed …

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